Friday, 27 July 2012


actually beating up a junior! MRS. ADETAYO: A what?! {Faces her son} You bullied a junior? BAYO: {stands up} No, I didn’t bully any child… MRS. ADETAYO: Oh, your teacher is lying? Ehn? {She dashes him a slap!} MISS EUNICE: Telling lies is one of the things I personally detest… BAYO: {holds his cheek tightly} Mummy, it is not true… MRS. ADETAYO: Shut up. And you’re still lying? {Pulls his ears painfully} In my presence? If you refuse to heed to words, you would heed to beating… {She hits him hardly on theback and hits his head.} MISS EUNICE: Em…ma, he wouldn’t do such again… MRS. ADETAYO: {furiously} Imagine him lying to my face after I’ve spared the rod….and…and… MISS EUNICE: {cuts in}…and spoilt the child; hm-hm, I agree, your child is quite spoilt. Just don’t hand-beat him, a cudgel could be of good use… MRS. ADETAYO: My hands would perform wonders this time. {She starts beating him hardly and Miss Eunicegently leaves the scene unnoticed.} BAYO: {trying to fight back tears} I didn’t beat anybody, mummy. She is lying… MRS. ADETAYO: Really? Why would she lie on you, hm? Tell me! I will take back all the fried rice, chicken and salad I’ve brought you after attending the PTA meeting! BAYO: I don’t like salad… MRS. ADETAYO: Shut up. Was this how I brought you up? I will ensure your father hears this… {Miss Eunice quickly walks up to her.} MISS EUNICE: Em…hello, ma… MRS. ADETAYO: Yes? Any problem? Did he beat up another junior? MISS EUNICE: Em. No ma…I’mnot sure but maybe…okay…em, your sonis David Akintayo Pepple, right? MRS. ADETAYO: He is Adetayo, not Akintayo. I amMrs. Adetayo. What about that? MISS EUNICE: Seems like there is a mix-up somewhere… MRS. ADETAYO: Pardon? MISS EUNICE: Em, from the name I have in this file, it is David Akintayo. I think…I mean it wasn’t yourson that…that did it. It is the boy over there… {Points towards a boy whois being chastised by Miss Evelyn.} MRS. ADETAYO: What? It’s not my son? After I’ve beaten him black and blue?! MISS EUNICE: {Forges a smile} Well, I’m sorry for that. But we all make mistakes; that’s why we are human beings… MRS. ADETAYO: But some mistakes are better not made! MISS EUNICE: I’m sorry about that. {Bayo eyes his teacher and hisses.} At least, he is not complaining. {She tries to leave.} MRS. ADETAYO: Eh, hold it there, Mrs. Frog eye… MISS EUNICE: Excuse me? What did you just call me? MRS. ADETAYO: I know you can hear well. Let me feed you with some words before you take your pathetic self out of here… MISS EUNICE: Ma, you shouldn’t blame me for treating your son like a delinquent juvenile; you never even believed in your son for a second, not even a benefit of doubt… MRS. ADETAYO: It’s my fault? MISS EUNICE: I’m sure it’s not mine. You should know what your son can or cannot do by now. He is in JSS 3 for crying out loud. MRS. ADETAYO: You’ve really got the gift of blame-shifting… MISS EUNICE: I took after my mother I never met in that wise; meet you at the PTA meeting. {She leaves.} MRS. ADETAYO: Is this woman alright? {To her son} Bayo, I’m so sorry. BAYO: Sorry ko… {He sits back in the car angrily, cleaning his face.} {A bike stops by the school gate and a woman in Ankara alights and paysthe ‘okada’ rider. She then walks into the school compound carrying a polybag. She runs into a student.} MRS. KUFORIJI: Eh, em, iwo omo yii. JAPHET: Good afternoon, ma. MRS. KUFORIJI: {reties her wrapper) Please, you knowany boy called Dare? JAPHET: Dare? MRS. KUFORIJI: Ehn-ehn oh.I think he is in JSS 2. JAPHET: I know him very well; he is my classmate… MRS. KUFORIJI: Please, call him for me. I am his mother. JAPHET: Okay ma. {He walks away briskly. Mrs. Kuforiji looks around and sees Mrs. Adetayo, her secondary school friend!} MRS KUFORIJI: {smiles broadly} eh, eh, eh. Se ki n se Funke ree? {Sights Mrs. Adetayo very well.} Oun naa nii; it is her. {Her son hugs her tightly.} DARE: I have missed you very much. MRS. KUFORIJI: Ah, Dare omo mi, bawo ni? Bawo ni eko? DARE: It’s fine, mummy. MRS. KUFORIJI: Ewo ni eebo too n so jare… DARE: Awon akeko wa ti kilo fun wa pe ki a ma so ‘vernacular’… MRS. KUFORIJI: Ver…ki re ni? Woo, eyin le mo. Yoruba is your ‘modern’ tongue.{notices a gap in his teeth} Ki lo se eyin e?! DARE: Em…senior kan lo na mi ti o kan mi leyin… MRS. KUFORIJI: Senior oriibuwo niyen. Ehn?! DARE: Senior David. MRS. KUFORIJI: Maa ri teacher e ti n ba lo. Awon senior yin se buru bayii? Je ki n lo ki Funke, ore mi timotimo laye ijo yen. DARE: Nnkan ti e ba mi gbe wa da? MRS. KUFORIJI: {pulls him} Tele mi ka lo. {She walks up to Mrs. Adetayo with her son.} MRS. KUFORIJI: Funke, ore mi… MRS. ADETAYO: Hello? {Tries to remember her face} Em…em…is this Salawu? MRS. KUFORIJI: Of ‘cross’. {They both hug each otherhappily.} MRS. ADETAYO: You’ve really changed oh. I couldn’t even recognise you again. MRS. KUFORIJI: That’s me. ‘Awayu’? MRS. ADETAYO: I’m awesome. MRS. KUFORIJI: Em, sorry about that but I’m good. MRS. ADETAYO: {startled} Excuse me?

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